Starcraft: The Musical
by Void Child
Summary: A series of song parodies about the epic story of Starcraft I. Open to song suggestions.


**Void Child presents "Starcraft: The Musical"**

_**"I'll Make a Marine Out of You" - A parody of Mulan's "I'll Make a Man out of You" © Disney**_

(Takes place some time after the Magistrate agrees to forge ties with Mengsk and the Sons of Korhal. Some colonists are being trained for war.)

**Sergeant:  
**Let's get down to business  
To defeat the Zerg  
Did they send me ice cubes  
When I asked for 'bergs?  
You're a dirty bunch  
Of drooling apes  
But when this  
Rebellion's due  
I will have made Marines  
Out of you.

Cold and tough as mountains  
But a fire within  
Once you find your rifle  
And you may just win  
You're a peaceful, pale  
Backwater lot  
And your skin is soft as goo  
Somehow I'll make Marines  
Out of you!

**Bob:  
**I'm never gonna get some rest

**Joe:  
**Zerg're gonna eat right through me

**Bill:  
**Boy was I fool for never working out!

**John:  
**I'm just tryna do my best

**Sam:  
**Everyone's gonna outdo me

**Cornelius:  
**Tired of being called a drunken, lazy lout!

**Sergeant:  
**(Be Marines)  
We must be swift as a racing vulture  
(Be Marines)  
With all the force of a firebat roast  
(Be Marines)  
With all the strength of a siege tank's cannon  
Mysterious as a hidden, deadly ghost!

Time is racing toward us  
Till the Zerg arrive  
Run and grab a bunker  
And you might survive!  
You're unsuited for  
This bloody war  
So pack up, run off  
Adieu  
How could I make Marines  
Out of you?

(Be Marines)  
We must be swift as a racing vulture  
(Be Marines)  
With all the force of a firebat roast  
(Be Marines)  
With all the strength of a siege tank's cannon  
Mysterious as a hidden, deadly ghost!

_**"The Zerg Prepare" - A parody of Lion King's "Be Prepared" © Disney**_

(Takes place directly before Zerg mission 8, right after the Overmind has awoken.)

**Overmind:  
**I know you've a lack of willpower  
You disregard, yet always abide.  
But right now, in our darkest hour...  
My words are the turn of the tide.

Our whole world is lifeless and barren  
Your int'llect has taken its toll.  
But we are talking Protoss and Terran!  
Listen up and envision our goal.

So prepare to complete a great cycle!  
Be prepared for a challenging feat!  
Our race's salvation  
After this invasion

**Zasz:  
**Can you go a bit faster?

**Overmind:  
**Just listen to master.  
I know it sounds florid  
And no small bit horrid  
When my plans are finally complete!  
And let not one Protoss be spared  
Be prepared!

**Daggoth: **Yeah, be prepared! Yeah, we'll be prepared...for what?  
**Overmind: **For the invasion of Aiur!  
**Daggoth: **Who's Aiur?  
**Overmind: **No, you fool, the Protoss homeworld... And we're leaving Zerus.  
**Zasz: **Great idea! Who needs a homeworld?  
**Cerebrates: **No world, no world, la-lala-la-laa-laa!  
**Overmind: **IDIOTS! We will have a world!  
**Daggoth: **Hey, but you said, uh...  
**Overmind: **Aiur will be our world! Stick with me...and you can kill as much as you please!  
**Cerebrates: **Yaay! All right! All hail the Master!  
**Zerg Swarm: **All hail the Master! All hail the Master!

It's great that we're under the control  
Of a master with wisdom and form!

**Overmind:  
**Of course, aside from praise and extol  
You must give your life for the Swarm.  
The future just glitters with wonder  
Be patient, though, don't hold your breath.  
You will be perfect, not one blunder.  
REBELLION IS PUNISHED BY DEATH!

So prepare for the turn of the eon!  
Be prepared for a marvelous scam!  
Milennia planning  
And tireless scanning  
Forgotten, forsaken  
But don't be mistaken

I'll no longer be hated  
But praised, commedated  
And seen as the god that I am!  
Now go to the war I've declared  
Be prepared!

**Zerg Swarm:  
**Yes, we'll go to the war we've declared  
Be prepared!

_**"Shakuras Nights" - A parody of Aladdin's "Arabian Nights" © Disney**_

(Takes place during the end of Protoss mission 8, after the stasis cell is destroyed and Zeratul arrives.)

**Aldaris:  
**I expected you to attempt to retrieve your hero. You will learn that the will of the Conclave is absolute. Make peace with Adun.

**Zeratul:  
**Stay thy hand, Judicator. The stewards of Tassadar shall not fail while the Dark Templar live. Call off your guards and stand aside, and you may yet live to see another moonrise.

**Aldaris:  
**What? Who are you?!

**Zeratul:  
**Oh, I come from a land, from a faraway earth  
Where the soaring kakarus roam  
Where they cut off your hair  
At your moment of birth  
It's primitive, but hey, it's home!

When the dark, dusty dunes  
Are but lit by the moons  
And the stars in the Void are right  
Come on down  
Stop on by  
Hop a dropship and fly  
To our eternal Shakuras night!

Oh, Shakuras nights!  
Over here, there's no days!  
Under this black sky  
You'd most likely die  
In various ways!

Oh, Shakuras nights!  
'Neath twin Shakuras moons!  
Home of the outcasts  
Outsiders die fast  
To patrolling dragoons.

**Aldaris:  
**I will not be addressed by one so devoid of the Khala's light.

**A/N: And there's more where that came from. I'll update as soon as I can, and am open to song suggestions.**


End file.
